The Parallel Audio Bible

This first appeared here on April 1st, 2014. That in itself ought to tell you something. The product concept came to me in a dream, the same night in which I tried anchovies on pizza for the first time. It made it’s debut on a Christian book industry website with this announcement.

Every once in awhile, in addition to writing the news here, we get to make the news! Such is the case today as we unveil a product that I’ve been working on for nearly 12 months: The Parallel Audio Bible. Using technology that has sat idle since the days of quadrophonic sound, the PA Bible uses four distinct voices — two male and two female — each speaking the text at the same time. You simply — as you would at a social gathering, or in the church lobby — lock on to one speaker and within seconds, your brain automatically tunes out all the others, just like it does after church when Mrs. Forthright is exchanging some exceptionally juicy gossip about the choir director.

Furthermore, this advanced technology allows us to produce customized combinations so that we can take orders for which ever audio combination you desire. So…imagine a family heading on a long car trip: Mom likes the ESV, the teenage son likes The Message, the preteen daughter likes the NLT and Dad is an NIV guy. You simply start the audio playing and everyone is satisfied simultaneously. (Channel assignments may require an adjustment in who sits where, and who ends up driving. If your preteen daughter is not licensed, some audio rewiring of your car may be necessary.)

The audio is available on CD, mp3, and because of general industry acknowledgement of its resurgence, vinyl records. (Note: Vinyl LPs may be incompatible with some car audio systems.) Stores wishing to carry the product will appreciate the automatic shipment program, where product will be shipped each time another edition of the 118 possible combinations is manufactured; and will especially appreciate the extra discount made possible by a non-returnable policy.

So don’t be the last one in your market to offer this product. Sign up today!

Parallel Audio Bible — Many Translations, One Product

(Note: Due to varying text lengths between translations, this product is not available in The Amplified Bible or The Voice.)

Wednesday Link List

Not new, but too good just to link; you have to watch this…

• Edith Shaeffer, wife of the late Christian philosopher Francis Shaeffer, has died at age 98. 
• A member of The Church on the Way in Valencia,CA — and grandson of Jack Hayford, the church’s founder — is now back home uninjured after being kidnapped last week in Mexico.
• Singer Carrie Underwood and NHL hockey player Mike Fisher discuss their shared faith in Jesus.
• Know the song “‘Tis a Gift To Be Simple”?  Terry Mattingly says that definitely applies to the new Pope.
• Yes the Easter story really happened in a real place, and if you want, you can even get the GPS coordinates.
• And did they play that “It’s Friday, but Sunday’s a-Coming” video at your church this week? Here’s the text for all you aspiring preachers to give it your best shot.
• And don’t miss this story about church pyrotechnics gone awry. This could have ended very badly.
  
• Also at Parchment Pen: Did the author of the Gospel of Mark sleep in the nude?  The public wants to know.
• Sandy Patti is headlining at Carnegie Hall with the Manhattan Pops Orchestra and the pianist formerly (and still) known simply as Dino.
• For 32 years, Rick Warren said ‘no’ to the idea of doing a radio show. But then a year ago…
• A friend of ours, Rick Webster, pastor of The Third Space church in Peterborough has written Introducing Jesus — but he doesn’t use the word pastor, preferring Spiritual Wilderness Guide and Community Architect. We don’t normally do this here, but you can order the book online. 
• From the artist who brought us the Reimagine song, a cover of Larry Norman’s UFO song.
  
• Canadian author and blogger Sheila Wray-Gregoire says that if you are concerned for someone, you need to ask yourself three questions before you say anything.
• Another Elevation Church high-tech year end summary. Does your church’s annual report look like this?
  
• Maybe some cartoonists can illustrate complex issues, but Dave Walker finds himself somewhat lost for ideas in Uganda. 
• Okay, Doug Wilson, curiosity was killing me when you wrote Good Friday and the Death of Same Sex Envy. (And then he also discusses pattern recognition, too.)
  
• Shauna Niequist is the wife of a Christian musician and daughter of a world famous pastor. And a published author.  But she still deals with jealousy.
• Money Where Your Mouth Is Department: Michael Kelley offers us two things we can learn from the Veronica Mars movie campaign on Kickstarter.
  
• How about another 30-or-so links, all on the subject of apologetics? And don’t miss the first comment. 
• Blog flashback — one year ago: James MacDonald’s holiness test.
  
• The latest addition to our “lost song” collection at YouTube is this original version of God and Man at Table by Craig Smith. 
• And I didn’t realize until today how much this song and this song sound alike. Guess some classic gospel music or CCM just flies under the copyright radar.
  

Psalm 119? Noooo! Not That One!

Today’s post is also last night’s post at my devotional blog, Christianity 201

I think it’s rather ironic that Psalm 119 has become associated with the weariness some people have with Bible reading. Its 176 verses are simply too much for some people, and yet, it is a Psalm that is all about having a love of God’s word.

In David’s time, the “scriptures” would refer primarily to the books of the law. Many people reading this feel about Leviticus the way they feel about Psalm 119; it epitomizes something that seems to just go on and on and on.

And yet, these books, Leviticus included, are what David says he loves. Every single verse of the Psalm talks about his love of God’s laws, statutes, commandments.

Is David the kind of guy who gets excited reading the complete federal income tax codes? Does he enjoy studying the Motor Vehicle Act? Would he actually read through the instruction manual that come with most consumer electronics?

I don’t think so. But I think he really sees the character of God expressed in the laws he gave. And he believes that they were written for his good.  You have to approach some sections of scripture — i.e. Leviticus — with that attitude or you won’t derive anything from your reading.

I say all that to tell a story.

This week we were in a Goodwill donation processing center in Toronto, a place where we are told merchandise is returned from various stores for final sale prior to being destroyed. These are the shoes no one wanted, the t-shirts that didn’t sell, and the books that were picked over.

Yes, books. And among those books were three New Testaments.

Now you need to know four things about me:

• We’re not loaded with money; the 50-cents a copy they were asking for these was a bit of a stretch, especially after my wife had already selected some other items.
• Our house is already full of books; we didn’t really need three more; there is truly no place to put them.
• I didn’t have anyone in mind who I was going to give them to.
• I sell Bibles for a living. I have a vested interested in  new books, not used books.

But I bought them.

They were in reasonable condition, and I couldn’t handle the idea of them being pulped for recycling into other books.

I could spiritualize this and say that it was because I have ‘such a great love for God’s word.’ I could say, ‘The Bible is so precious to me, I couldn’t bear to see one thrown out.’ I won’t do that here. It was simply my WWDD — What Would David Do? — moment.  A Psalm 119 moment.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your love of scripture, your love for God’s word?

And don’t for a minute let this Book of The Revelation be out of mind. Ponder and meditate on it day and night, making sure you practice everything written in it. Then you’ll get where you’re going; then you’ll succeed. ~ Joshua 1:8 (The Message)